The Divorcer – splitting up famous people, starting with Tom Cruise

We were scouring Google Images looking for who-knows-what for a future post (hey, we sometimes run out of ideas), and stumbled on a picture of some famous couple divorcing. That made us think of a gimmick. So, we’re going to grab a bunch of pictures of legitimate split-ups and then make up a few of our own. We shall call our stupid joke “The Divorcer.”  Here are several examples at the expense of one of our favorite punching bags – Tom Cruise.

The Divorcer Strikes!

The Divorcer Strikes Again!

The Divorcer is almost getting embarrassed  for you now, Tom.

As you know, Tom has been divorced three times, but betcha didn’t know about his cohabitational arrangement with Val Kilmer back in the 1980s. Yeah, seems that they got it on during the filming of the movie Top Gun and then shacked up for several weeks until Val found out Tom was seeing Mimi Rogers. The break-up did not go well. Oddly, they both sparred over Zac Efron’s affections in 2005. Val had kept an eye on young Zac and as soon as he turned 18, bam!, Val was there with flowers. As it turned out, Zac wasn’t into older men. Val licked his wounds and gained a ton of weight and Tom swung back to the breeder track eventually marrying Katie Holmes.

Sometimes we wonder what’s wrong with us.

We really don’t know much about our demographic since we’re too cheap to pay for a them that includes those types of analytics, so we aren’t sure if this is working it for you or not. However, given the popularity of our Boobs posts, we’re guessing not. Well, for the remaining 13% of you, enjoy or something.

And our final split up for the day: Mel “Ragin’ Mad” Gibson and Robyn Moore. We don’t know Ms. Moore, but on paper, it appears she was dumped into a dung heap by Mel and then covered with used cat litter. We were indifferent towards Mel as an actor before all of the bat-shitedness of his antics over the last few year came to light, but now we don’t much care for him at all. Incidentally, the joke on the picture about Robyn going to hell isn’t a joke. Mel really does believe she will and was even convinced of it while they were still married.

If we have any readers that are members of the Opus Dei, nice try. We don’t care what your spokespeople say, we know Mel is a member of your secret society. Actually, that wasn’t very nice of us. We know a couple of Opus Deirs and they’re zealous but not loony, as far as we know anyway.