North Korea declares war on sanity!

North Korean Flag

Well, we shouldn’t be surprised, should we? In the face of new sanctions, North Korea‘s official spookspeople released a statement indicating the hermit kingdom is ready to launch a preemptive nuclear strike against the United States. Several hours later, the United Nations Security Council voted unanimously to impose heavy sanctions. Even the Chinese can no longer justify backing the lunatics on the peninsula. The back of Dennis Rodman’s head exploded moments later.

Dennis Rodman visits North Korea and Kim Jong-un
Weird is as weird does. The Li’l Dumpling meets The Worm.
North Korean long range nuclear missle on parade
Is this an over-compensation thing?

North Korean Soldiers Marching at a Military Parade

We’ve written several posts about our disgust for dictatorships. Oppression comes in many forms, but fascist/communist criminal organizations like the North Korean government take it up a notch because they do it on a mass scale. The North Korean regime is also expert in psychological manipulation. Over the years, the Kims have developed a formidable cult of personality around their family’s dynasty. There must be something in the water when it comes to that sort of thing. How do pug-ugly dudes like the Kims, Hitler, Idi Amin, Muammar Gaddafi, Vladimir Lenin (and every USSR leader thereafter), Saddam Hussein, Osama bin-Laden, … geez, the list goes on, build a mystique and astonishingly powerful and personal demagoguery.

Kim Jong-un at a Military Event
Li’l Kim and his shameless, ass-kissing lackeys.
North Korean citizens mourning the death of Kim Jong-il
In one of the biggest coincidences ever known to modern man, over 40,000 North Koreans lost their contacts at the same time.
North Koreans mourning along the funeral procession of Kim Jong-il
Are you kidding? It’s freezing out here! We’ve already been waiting to get into the Grand Opening of Walmart-Pyongyang, and now they’re letting that pompous, pudgy porker in first?! Oh, shit. Here come the State Security Department goons.
North Korean women crying
Why do women cover their mouths when they laugh and cry? Seriously. Why?

Call us superficial, but if we’re going to be caught up in a nationalistic frenzy around a charismatic yet highly oppressive dictator, we’d choose Mitt Romney. He’s a looker with an infectious smile. Plus, his gulags would come with Olympic-size swimming pools and caviar.

Mitt Romney is a good looking man
Look, we’re not trying to compare Adolf Hitler with Mitt Romney. We’re just saying that if Mitt were a dictator, we’d prefer to hero worship his visage over ol’ Bristlebrush Puffyface.

3 thoughts on “North Korea declares war on sanity!

  1. On the plus side, the Kims provide cartoonists such as myself with an endless supply of material. I wonder how long, before we see a comic book cover of Captain America uppercutting the latest Kim-clone?

    1. The Kims are ridiculous caricatures of themselves so a cartoonist would be hard-pressed to make them any more buffoonish. It might be interesting to draw Kim Jong-un as an attractive, well-dressed individual just for the irony.

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